stop pretending

Sometimes life is challenging. Sometimes loving is difficult. Sometimes it is easier to just "fake it."
But, I do not want to do that. I do not want to put up a facade. I do not want to pretend to do the right thing.
I want to be sincere and genuine. I desperately want to be this. I want to see the hearts of people. I want to earnestly listen to them, to care about what they care about. I want to willingly and joyfully set aside my plans and intentions in order to give to another. I want to be the person God desires me to be and encourage others to be who He wants them to be also.
I do not want to put on a show for people. I do not want to do what's right so that I will be rewarded or patted on the back. I do not want to put on a smile that is akin to a set of wax lips. I do not want to give pat answers.
Above all, I want to be like Jesus. I want to show mercy and compassion. I want to listen. I want to get angry about injustice. I want to be patient. I want to forgive quickly. I want to believe the best of people, even when I have a list of reasons not to. And, I do not want any of it to be out of a sense of self-righteousness or obligation or guilt. I want it to just be who I am...because of Who is in me.

"Don't just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. When God's people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality." Romans 12:9-13