Do you ever have those days? Days when you walk away discouraged? Days when you are tempted to punch someone square in the jaw? Days when you want to revert to being a toddler and throw a proper tantrum? Days when an entire pan of brownies won't make it better...and actually makes it worse because then you feel sick, too? Days when you are shocked to realize some of the ugliness that lurks within you? Days when you just feel defeated?
I do. I think everyone does. (And, I think if you refuse to acknowledge that you do, you may also have some denial issues.)
I have had days just like these. I had one the other day.
In case you were concerned, I did not punch anyone, lay down on the ground and scream at the top of my lungs, or eat an entire pan of brownies. But, every one of those things flashed through my mind.
Instead, I opted to pray (while I was stuck in traffic), to sing [loudly] as I drove down the road, to tell God how thankful I was for His goodness toward me, to breathe deeply (trying to ignore the exhaust fumes and sewage odors), to be thankful that I was not the woman standing on the side of the road puking her guts out who I drove past (and then to pray she would feel better soon), to genuinely thank the young man who pumped my gas [even though it is his job], to wield my mosquito bat on the pests invading my bedroom, to journal my thoughts and feelings, to have a cup of tea and read a book, and to allow myself to be reminded that regardless of my jdkfaljda;kfdj day, Jesus is still seated on the Throne of Heaven and His love and grace toward me remain the same.
"Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise Him again--my Savior and my God! Now I am deeply discouraged, but I will remember You--even from distant Mount Hermon, the source of the Jordan, from the land of Mount Mizar. I hear the tumult of the raging seas as your waves and surging tides sweep over me. But each day the LORD pours His unfailing love upon me, and through each night I sing His songs, praying to God who gives me life. 'O God my rock,' I cry. 'Why have you forgotten me? Why must I wander around in grief, oppressed by my enemies?' Their taunts break my bones. They scoff, ' Where is this God of yours?' Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise Him again--my Savior and my God!" Psalm 42:5-11